The Perfect Lemon Drop Martini

There are few things in life I feel very passionate about, having a Lemon Drop Martini made properly is one of them.

After sampling 4 or 5 (bakers dozens) I've come to know what works and what is completely unacceptable in creating the perfect lemon drop.  Before I tell you my magical recipe here are a few things that you need to know when ordering a one of these tasty devils are a bar.  Firstly and MOST importantly, if you see the word 'limoncello' do not order it.  For those of you who aren't familiar limoncello it's a Italian lemon liqueur which is extremely offensive to the taste buds. If you are one of the few people who actually likes that garbage I officially forbid you from reading on.  Secondly, do not use flavoured vodka, please for the love of god.  No lemon vodka will not make it extra delicious. With a lemon drop you're not going to want anything beyond the basics.

BEFORE YOU BREAK OUT THE MARTINI SHAKER:

• Start off by creating a simple syrup. Do this by dissolving as much white sugar as you can in about a cup of water.  Using warm water works best, but you will have to do this ahead of time so you aren't adding warm ingredients to your martini.
• Cut a wedge of lemon and run it around the rim of your martini glass.
• Have a small plate ready with some white sugar leveled out on it.  
• Take your lemon rimmed glass and dip it  sparingly into the plate of sugar then put the glasses in the freezer.

LEMON DROP RECIPE:

• Ice
• Simple Syrup 
• Vodka --- preferably Russian Standard
• Triple Sec  --- optional
• Lemons ---- It's best to have a lot of these on hand because the amount needed depends on the ripeness ... plus who knows how many you will want!?

Fill your martini shaker 3/4 with ice.  Add 4oz of Vodka and 1/2oz Triple Sec.  Add the juice of one lemon and throw a couple of lemon rinds in as well.  Add approximately 1oz of simple syrup.  Shake the shit of it.  Now and most importantly, test your mixture.  Don't get ahead of yourself and pour a below average product into your nicely rimmed glasses.  You may want to add a little more lemon or simple syrup depending on what you like.  Once it taste right pour it into your chilled, sugar rimmed glasses and ENJOY.

This recipe makes 2 martinis because I don't encourage drinking by yourself... BUT we've all been there, so if your sad enough to be drinking alone you might as well get drunk.

Being In The Winners Circle.. When No One Else Is Playing.

I'm currently 10 days into a 24 day cleanse.  We're not talking about something crazy like only drinking cayenne honey lemon water until your asshole prolapses, just a boring old cleanse.  It's probably easier to say what I can eat than list the million things I can't.  Basically it's lean proteins, non starchy vegetables and limited fruit.  As for beverages I'm thanking the sweet lord above coffee is legit and of course tea and water.  This means no alcohol.  No red wine, beer, lime palm bays, sangria or any of the other beverages I've come to enjoy so thoroughly.  This will mark a huge milestone in my drinking career.  Never in the past 8-9 years have I given my pickled liver more than a 6 day break, NEVER.  I did try once before on another cleanse to make it 12 days which failed miserably once Friday night rolled around.  I really do have a very special love for food but when it comes down to it I'll settle for oatmeal for the rest of my days as long as it's paired with my beverage of choice.  This may make me sound like an alcoholic and maybe I am but that doesn't change the facts.  This is going to be a LONG 24 days.  We're probably thinking the same thing, how on earth am I going to pull this off? I consider myself a very competitive person.  I'll use any excuse to turn a friendly game into something a little less friendly that can likely be bragged about later.  I can single handedly do this to ANY game that has more than 1 person participating.  Cranium, cards, bocce, baseball you name it and I've probably got money or my dignity (usually both) riding on the outcome.   Solo sports have never been my thing and you can probably figure out why.  Honestly I have a hard time playing games on my phone more than once because it's so god damn boring trying to beat your own score.  I've always thought of people that lived for solo sports to be weaker human beings.  Maybe they don't stand a chance in a game against anyone but themselves?  My apologies and condolences if that's what you're in to and I'm forced to wonder, what is the point?!  This may make me out to sound a bit intense and maybe even petty but I'm always in it for the possibility of a win.  This obviously isn't the outcome every time (I lack natural athletic skill) and often I'm forced to swallow sadness but at least I'm swallowing something.  Imagine winning something like the world cup in ping pong, jumping up and down alone, hugging yourself.  Or imagine eating a 12 pack of calorie free long johns watching The Real World on MTV.  I would take the latter even if I had to replace MTV for TSN because winning alone isn't winning at all.  I consider a cleanse some form of a solo sport, which as I stated above I'm no good at.  I've proven this time and time again, I just don't care enough to see the outcome when I'm the only one at the finish line.  This is where the problem started.  I had to ask myself how I could get through this with out the force of a competition driving me.  Then I realized I didn't have to.   What this has turned into a classic dual only it's between fat me and skinny me, weak me and strong me and it's working like a charm.  Changing my mind set was all it took.  As long as I feel that I'm beating someone out (in this case my fat and weak alter ego) I can persevere through anything.  So I guess you can say I'm starting to think slightly more of all you solo sport lovers and starting to understand your mind set.  Maybe solo sports really can be fun and make you look cool.  I'm actually thinking of taking one up myself, check it out: http://www.howtodothings.com/how-to-spin-a-nunchuck If you know me at all you know that by me writing this blog there is no doubt in my mind I will make it the full 24 days.  Even though I'm only a portion of the way through this (14 days 4 hours to go) I can already see the finish line and taste the victory (a 24 oz glass of sangria).   Honestly never thought I would be saying this but I actually feel great.  I have more energy, I'm getting more done at work, I'm no longer a slave to my stomach and I'm even more happy (until Saturday night rolls around obviously).  Maybe it's a bit empowering to know my main addictions and habits don't control me and I'm capable of abstinence, at least for a short period of time.  Oh I also came to the realization that any future children I have with be produced in a surrogate womb.  Even one weekend off the sauce really can put a lot into prospective.  Nine months sounds like a death sentence, or worse, a baby with FAS.  Well enjoy your beverages of choice this weekend and have an extra (dozen) for me.